Dig in!

Is raising a child like war? No. Well, probably not. Okay, maybe there are times that it definitely feels like a battle. But this parenting thing is supposed to be easy, and come naturally, and be such a perfect extension of ourselves, right?

And all the parents in the room laugh themselves off their chairs, as the non-parents look around wondering what could be wrong with that statement, which seems correct.

Parenting is the hardest, longest, messiest, most emotional up-hill battle that I have ever witnessed and taken part in. There is nothing about it that has ever come easy to me, except for my deep love for my children. Past that, if anyone had ever had an honest sit-down discussion with me before I had children on the countless nights of no sleep, no showering, no personal space, personal time, personal anything, added to the 800 lbs of guilt about everything related to my children that I would go through in the first many years of their lives, I would have peace'd out long ago. But no one did.

And at one point, I was a scared 23 1/2 year old, rocking a baby in the middle of the night, suddenly hit by the sheer enormous responsibility that this baby was in my life. And then I realized that no one tells you any of this on purpose because most of us smarty pants would never have children if we knew better. But I didn't know better. And I can tell you that I am *probably* a better person for it.

I have been rolling the idea of this blog around in my mind for several years, not because I am by any means an expert. At all. But because I sincerely believe that we are to train our children, not just 'parent' them. Also because I so wish that there was someone that had a little more wisdom than me when I was starting out that could just tell me all the things that everyone else knows, but you have to learn for yourself. Like not all diapers are created equal. Like that your children are like wild animals and can smell your fear. That not all mom's are naturally maternal. *raises hand* That being a mom doesn't come 'natural' to all of us, and for some of us, we have to fight tooth and nail to get any of this mommy-ing stuff down.

Hello?

Can you imagine the looks on people's faces if you ever just responded to their, "Oh, how's the new baby?" questions with the truth? "Yeah, I haven't slept 2 consecutive hours in over 3 days, I have throw up in my hair, on my shirt, and probably somewhere on my bra, which constantly smells of milk, no matter how often I wash it. No part of my body hasn't been taken over by this child in some way or another since before it's birth, and I think I am losing my mind because I can't remember almost anything that has happening in the last 2 weeks from sleep deprivation. And like that's not bad enough, I have no idea what I am doing with this tiny bundle of human that someone thought I was mature enough to be in charge of for the REST OF MY LIFE. I am NOT responsible enough. Can you just take him back? Is there a return policy? I don't know where my left shoe is. I'm sorry, what was your real question? Oh right, we are doing great!"

I see new mommies lugging their car seats with the cute covers, their ginormous diaper bags that the baby could live out of until their first birthday, sporting the manic smile that we all get at some time, claiming over and over that "Everything's fine!"

Oh sweetie. Most of us have been there. I so wish that we as women didn't have this huge feeling that we constantly need to put up the show of being super mom. None of us are. And those moms that look like they have their crap together all the time? They don't, either. They just are really good at hiding it.

So my intention with this blog is to honestly share some training tricks and tips that I have come across that have helped me, who is not super mom, who still struggles with the maternal thing, and constantly feels like I am messing up in one area or another. This is a safe place. With lots of coffee.